As I sit here, on yet another cloudy, chilly Seattle day, I can't help but think about all the opportunities that lie ahead this year. A new year doesn't necessary mean we, or the things around us will change instantaneously, but with mindfulness and dedication, anything we hope to achieve and/or attract into our lives is possible. This is in someway an accountability post - one I can look at next year as we transition to 2020. 2018 was a year that brought a lot of pain and suffering to many in my life, including myself. It challenged us - learning to accept the things we cannot change, dealing with the grief of loosing loved ones, and intentionally challenging ourselves into uncomfortable situations. Yes, you read that correctly - intentionally. By doing just that, we challenge our fears and when we accomplish this, we lessen the negative energy and unhealthy anxiety that keeps us frozen in our place. Accept the anxiety and sit in it.
I'm not perfect, nor are you - this is another concept that I've come to understand better this past year, and although it may sound simple and easy enough to understand, so many of our inner demons stem from this artificial "need" to be perfect, and because of this, we compare ourselves to just about anyone and everyone around us. It's so damaging to our souls but also to the relationships around us. I have both bared witness and been a victim of this myself. It's not easy - accepting imperfection in ourselves - but with compassion and empathy for others it's much easier to comfort, but we don't have that same kind of compassion and empathy with ourselves - so we suffer. We are often times are our own worst friend. Our own worst bully. We bully ourselves into guilt and disappointment everyday - even if it's over something namelessly silly. We are constantly judging ourselves.
In saying this, I want 2019 to be the year of developing a healthy relationship with our minds, bodies, and spirits. A few nights ago I was inspired to write a list of positive affirmations and intentions for the new year. At the top of that list it reads, "to be kind, to forgive myself." In saying that, I hope that in 2019 less of my days (and your days) are spent isolated in negative thoughts. This means, getting outside, breathing in the fresh air, listening to the raindrops, basking in the sunshine, going on walks, and surrounding myself with healthy, supportive friends.
Not everyone can be there for you in these different transitions of life - a friend on Facebook wrote the other day, "you don't have to do it alone, but no one owes you anything either," and I couldn't agree more with that...even though it hurts, it's honest and true.
be kind, forgive,
to have compassion and empathy,
This post is dedicated to our baby Ruffles, who was so loved and cherished, our hearts will forever grieve the loss of his life.